A year can change everything

Frostie Boy is asleep.

It is one year since we signed up to defrost him and give him a go. Sometimes it freaks me out to think that he was frozen. But then the whole IVF process is freaky and yet fascinating at the same time.

I've been reflecting on this past year today. I catch myself wondering why did it work? Why that one egg out of the ten they retrieved? Why that one embryo out of the three viable ones? Why did the FET work when the fresh cycle didn't?

I also feel guilty. Guilty that we called our future son a "dud embryo" when he was frozen in Oct 2003 - shouldn't we have been more positive? Guilty that I managed to achieve success when others that I know still haven't.

But glad to not be back in that dark place of a year ago.